Before my wife was even pregnant with our second daughter, she attended a workshop that focused on this book, “Siblings Without Rivalry“, co-authored by Adele Faber. The book is so insightful and provides simple examples to have the points hit home. The bottom line that sibling rivalry stems from jealousy similar to that a spouse might feel if asked to welcome another husband or wife into the household – wow – how powerful a thought is that for a parent to understand what the older sibling is feeling when a baby comes home and needs so much attention and care! The book provides ways to defuse such explosive situations as comparing, assigning roles, or taking sides and suggests specific remedies to avoid conflict. I personally liked the cartoon-type illustrations and “quick reminders” to help reinforce new behavior.
My wife bought this book the week she attended the workshop. We both feel it’s a must-read for parents planning on a second child. Even if you have multiple children and the siblings are getting along fine now, the authors make very clear, rivalry is inevitable. The only question is how to manage the rivalry with intelligence and compassion, and on that subject they offer a wealth of good advice.
Our local public library has this book, as well as a few others by Adele Faber. So I really recommend you check it out – easy to read and full of interesting and useful points! Honestly, the concept of a second spouse coming into your home (who’s younger and everyone is coming to see and swoon over) is burned into my brain!